Zombie Round Up

One of our Young Life kids Sam sent me some info about working as a zombie during the Halloween season at the ranch he works for. I'm still not sure if he was being serious or not. I think serious. He said it could be a lot of fun and provide some seasonal employment. The "Zombie Round Up" ad calls for "dedicated individuals who have an extreme passion and creative talent for makin’ people shake in their boots!" This would not be me, but seeing as how the job hunt hasn't been going so hot, let's just say my mind started considering options like this.

I started thinking, "Maybe I can work a bunch of super random and slightly entertaining jobs for a year and write about my experiences." It would be like the show Dirty Jobs. I would do it in the name of journalism. I started preparing my This American Life submission in my head. Think of the stories I would have to tell and if I could refine my writing I might actually be able to produce some good journalism.

I logged onto the haunted ranch's website (just for kicks) and quickly decided I could not go through with this plan. First of all I hate ghost stories, scary movies, and all other things haunted. No joke I almost didn't want to send my resume for event planning to some historic mansions that host receptions because they have reports of "friendly" ghosts. Friendly or not I am not interested in toying with the idea of whether or not ghosts exist. That stuff just creeps me out, real or not, I don't care, too creepy. Anyway so the haunted ranch website has spooky sounds playing in the background when you log onto the site. You know whistling wind and that sort of thing. I had to mute my computer just to read the home page. They set up this story that the ranch had to relocate it's pumpkin patch last year because the old site was having mysterious happenings like missing ranch hands and reports of ghosts. Even the animals were becoming possessed at night. Most people would read this and giggle over its silliness. Me, I get spooked. How could I ever work at a place where I'm the one who is responsible for scaring others when I myself would be too scared to be out in the woods by myself?

So there goes the zombie career path.