Good God is it really 2012?

I found myself drawn to this little place since it is January 1st after all and that's how I started the blog back in 2010. I wanted to, as many people do, share a few thoughts with 2011 before bidding it adieu and then give 2012 a warm welcome.

2011 it's been real. You've been kind to me and my family, well for the most part. Just like I don't expect myself to be perfect, I certainly don't expect any year to be perfect either. The adversity we shared this year served its purpose in refining my character and maturing me. But back to the "for the most part"-part...for the most part it was a really nice year. Not amazing or one for the record books, but very nice nonetheless.

I think it felt more like a transition year more than anything. Lots of newness: new job, new friends, new experiences. Even the more challenging aspects of life were new or different than in the past. Daniel and I fought new fights, hang with me for a second. In marriage I feel like we bickered over the same things over and over again. We fought new fights over new issues, which means we've moved onto something new. Progress. The next stage. We're entering a new phase, which is exciting as we grow and learn together. Maybe the word "fight" has too negative of a connotation to articulate what I want to say. What I mean to say is that the conversation has changed. It's not the same old broken record. We're moving forward.

The other entity in my life who I've fought with is anxiety and in this relationship much ground has been gained as well. Talk about a new conversation. In fact anxiety and I don't have much of a relationship at this point. He shows up fairly frequently, but I can silence him pretty quickly by just continuing on with whatever else I was doing. I may have tense shoulders or toss and turn every once in awhile when trying to fall asleep, but I can proudly say that that's about the only effects he's had on me. I was too busy living and working.

Speaking of working, my new job has been perhaps the biggest blessing of this year. It provided such relief. I am a much healthier person in large part to this job. I don't have a choice to get out of bed each morning. It's not a battle, ever. I finally started to grow up and realize that whether or not I feel like doing something, sometimes you just have to put your head down and work and be productive and contribute to society. Like I said each day is not a battle anymore. I just get up and go to work each day. There's no question. And I find myself enjoying each day and thankful that I'm out in the world.

There have been lots of other highlights 2011, but you already know that as you were there. I have to say goodbye to you now and close this chapter of my life. I'll still carry with me a lot of what I learned. The experiences we shared will always be a part of me just like the ones from all the years before. You may have been an in-between year but you weren't without significance. Can I also just say that you went really fast? Like super fast. Well thanks again, goodbye.

2012, Daniel in his eternal and inspiring optimism thinks that this is going to be a good year. So much so that he often refers to it as "our year". The "our" refers both to his staff at work and I think his family too. So I'm embracing his optimism as well and am hoping for the best. Though I think a good year is determined less by external circumstances that it is by one's approach to life as well as their response to those circumstances; a "you make your own destiny" type of philosophy if you will. All the more reason to force optimism as my fate may lie somewhat in my own hands. So here we go. Be good to me and I'll be good to you. One day at a time. Any more cliches you can think of? No. Okay. It's nice to meet you. I think we'll get along just fine.